(FOR)GIVEN: On Death, Rape, and Violence Against Women
By Angel Santos
Death—Ah,
the ultimate goal. The headache-inducing smell of Cattleya, the heart
quenching sobs, the screaming silence of grief. I know a lot about
Death and what comes after it.
Death is nothing new to me. I lost my dad over cancer when I was eight. I lost three friends in a year (one died of cancer and two died of car accident) when I was twelve. You can say I had too much of everything too soon. It was always like that, I guess. Since then, I vowed not to be affected by anyone’s death. Death is a fact. Death is the ultimate goal. It is inevitable. It cannot be helped. Why bother? I remained faithful to indifference.
Until recently. She was not even my friend to begin with. I did not even know her on a personal level. I did not exchange a word with her. For me, she was just a name. She was just someone whose existence I know little of, whose sufferings I feel nothing for, and whose life experiences I know nothing of. She had no influence in my life whatsoever. She was just a name without a face. She was just a name.
Until I
heard the news. She was found dead one morning, her hands were tied and
her mouth was gagged. She was shot point blank and she was left
lifeless without any underwear. It was suspected that she was raped
before she was murdered. For me, she was just one of the many victims of
rape and murder. She was just a number, an additional to the statistics
of victims of violence against women. She was just a name until I saw
her picture in the news. Until her identity was revealed. Until
realization dawned on me—she was someone I knew back in high school. She
was someone I’ve seen. She was familiar. And yes, she was.
Shock was an understatement. Remorse was not even close to what I felt. I was furious. I was beyond disappointed in Humanity, or the lack of it. She died an undignified death, an undignified death. It was inhumane. Nobody deserves to die that way. Death by illness or accident is justifiable, but death by rape or any type of violence? NO. I was affected not because she was someone familiar to me, but because just like her, I am a person and a woman. She died a horrible death. She died in one of the worst ways possible. But that’s not the end of it. What’s worse is that some people’s reactions to her death go like Maybe she was showing off too much skin when that happened. She was probably out late and drunk. Maybe she was blah blah blah, she was asking for it.
My reaction: No woman wants to be raped.
Reality check: Rape (even Death) chooses no one. It can happen to any woman. It can happen to anyone whether she’s showing too much skin or hiding all of it, whether she’s drunk or sober. It can happen to any woman anytime, anywhere. And it will not stop there. It will not stop until we change our mindset, until we change the society's views on rape and other forms of violence against women... until we go against any form of violence, until we go against any acts that deters the peace in us, the peace in all. It will not stop until we start acting against it.
Death is inevitable. Rape is not.
I dream of one day that we can walk the streets of Philippines confident in peace. No violence, no crimes, no arms, no conflict. Just peace. I dream that one day no one will ever need to die like Given. She has given too much. Grace and sacrifice.
JUSTICE AND PEACE FOR GIVEN GRACE CEBANICO!
Death is nothing new to me. I lost my dad over cancer when I was eight. I lost three friends in a year (one died of cancer and two died of car accident) when I was twelve. You can say I had too much of everything too soon. It was always like that, I guess. Since then, I vowed not to be affected by anyone’s death. Death is a fact. Death is the ultimate goal. It is inevitable. It cannot be helped. Why bother? I remained faithful to indifference.
Until recently. She was not even my friend to begin with. I did not even know her on a personal level. I did not exchange a word with her. For me, she was just a name. She was just someone whose existence I know little of, whose sufferings I feel nothing for, and whose life experiences I know nothing of. She had no influence in my life whatsoever. She was just a name without a face. She was just a name.
 | |
| Given's most recent Facebook profile picture | . |
Shock was an understatement. Remorse was not even close to what I felt. I was furious. I was beyond disappointed in Humanity, or the lack of it. She died an undignified death, an undignified death. It was inhumane. Nobody deserves to die that way. Death by illness or accident is justifiable, but death by rape or any type of violence? NO. I was affected not because she was someone familiar to me, but because just like her, I am a person and a woman. She died a horrible death. She died in one of the worst ways possible. But that’s not the end of it. What’s worse is that some people’s reactions to her death go like Maybe she was showing off too much skin when that happened. She was probably out late and drunk. Maybe she was blah blah blah, she was asking for it.
My reaction: No woman wants to be raped.
Reality check: Rape (even Death) chooses no one. It can happen to any woman. It can happen to anyone whether she’s showing too much skin or hiding all of it, whether she’s drunk or sober. It can happen to any woman anytime, anywhere. And it will not stop there. It will not stop until we change our mindset, until we change the society's views on rape and other forms of violence against women... until we go against any form of violence, until we go against any acts that deters the peace in us, the peace in all. It will not stop until we start acting against it.
Death is inevitable. Rape is not.
I dream of one day that we can walk the streets of Philippines confident in peace. No violence, no crimes, no arms, no conflict. Just peace. I dream that one day no one will ever need to die like Given. She has given too much. Grace and sacrifice.
JUSTICE AND PEACE FOR GIVEN GRACE CEBANICO!
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The opinions expressed by the authors and those providing comments are theirs alone, and do not necessarily reflect the official stand of OPAPP.
OPAPP makes no representations as to the accuracy or completeness of any information on this site or found by following any link on this site. It will not be liable for any errors or omissions in this information nor for the availability of this information. It will not be liable for any losses, injuries, or damages from the display or use of this information.
OPAPP reserves the right to edit or delete any comments submitted to this blog without notice due to profanity, language or concepts that could be deemed offensive, and spam or questionable spam.
This policy is subject to change anytime.
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